Roadtrip fail

It still baffels me that Gill now posseses a legitimate driving license /albeit after six failed exams/ and this was meant to be our first official road trip, allegedly first of many to come.

In a wake of her personal reinvention as an aspiring masseus, Gill found and purchased a reasonably priced massage table on Ebay...located in Windsor.

The idea was to visit the town, maybe the castle, bask in the sun and have a nice lunch in some pub by the river. Reality check=we drove through the Windsor three times over, listening and singing along to Dolly Parton's CD three times over..

/bizarrely enough Gill prefers Dolly's version of 'I will always love you' over Whitney Houston's rendition, which she finds technically well executed - although not too crazy on all that lip-tremble - but emotionally dishonest/

..in a desperate and futile attempt to find a parking space.

So whilst the rest of the UK enjoyed their Sunday afternoon trip to Windsor, me and Gill ended up in a godforbidden place called Ouzeley, sitting by the river with snack from BB Fuels petrol station shop /oh yes, there was some naughty cheescake and lemon cake and two bottles of forrest fruit cider/, feeding ducks bread which is totally not good for them, discussing penises and poop, as we do, plus I've been given a lesson on so called defloration porn, which might have scared me for life.

Btw, the table turned out to be a great purchase and that same day I had the privilege to be a first ever person to be given a complimentary massage on it.