"You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star." — Friedrich Nietzsche
Let’s get one thing straight: we are not okay.
Navigating the smoldering, neon-drenched rubble of late-stage capitalism, our brains are rotting from algorithm-fed rage, the planet is running a fever that would make a reactor core blush and - inevitably, so are we…our nervous system on fire and a soggy paper towel in hand, trying to clean up a toxic spill that’s been leaking since the industrial revolution.
If you’ve felt this on a soul-deep level lately: this overwhelming sense of dissolution, of the boundaries blurring between your own burnout and the world’s…congratulations:
You’re right on time for the main event: the Total Lunar Eclipse in Pisces - Sunday, 7th September!
A cosmic CTRL+ALT+DEL for our collective consciousness, we’re long overdue a karmic rinse cycle, a divine intervention designed to wash away the illusions we’ve been clinging to like they’re the last roll of toilet paper in 2020. It feels like nails grating against a chalkboard, if the chalkboard has your five-year future plan scribbled on it. This is a moment of profound release, and trust me, it’s going to get messy.
Your Mission, Should You Choose to Accept It: The Pisces-Virgo Angle
For the past year, we’ve been in training for this. Think of it as the most fucked-up season of a cosmic reality show, let's call it The Nodal Axis: Purgatory.
Our main story arc? The Pisces-Virgo axis.
The South Node in Virgo represents the comfort zone we’ve been stuck in: the endless to-do lists, the neurotic perfectionism, the anxiety-fueled need to control and organize every detail of our lives into submission. It’s the part of us that believes if we can somehow manage the psychic apocalypse.
It’s an addiction to the mundane - a way of blocking out the terrifying, beautiful chaos of the universe.
The North Node in Pisces is the final boss: radical surrender. It’s the mission objective we’ve been avoiding because it’s terrifying. It demands we let go of the illusion of control, trust our intuition over the data, and remember that our worth isn’t measured by our fucking productivity.
This eclipse is the mid-season finale… a major plot point designed to force our character development. It’s a fated event, a portal that yanks us out of the Virgoan weeds and dunks us headfirst into the Piscean ocean of spirit, dreams, and collective grief.
As Hunter S. Thompson, a man who knew a thing or two about weird rides, put it: "Buy the ticket, take the ride."
Saturn Fell Back Into Pisces & You Will Too
I guess, just to make things spicier, the dreaded commander in chief Saturn, slid back into Pisces on September 1st for its final six-month tour of duty. Think of it as the universe’s most brutally honest friend showing up to help you pack for a move, but instead of just folding your sweaters, they’re making you justify every sentimental piece of junk you’ve been hoarding since March 2023.
Saturn’s retrograde return is a necessary & uncomfortable review of the lessons we were supposed to learn about boundaries, spiritual discipline, confronting our own escapist bullshit.
I think of his time with Pisces as a structural test - Saturn wants to know if the spiritual foundations you’ve built can withstand the coming flood. Where have your energetic boundaries been leaking? What illusions are you ready to get real about? How do your innermost beliefs align with how you show up in the world? Are they in sync?
This could come up in your one-to-one relationships as a forced re-assessment, a sort of audit from hell nobody asked for, but the results are expected by Friday, and no, ChatGPT will not help you craft this fucking report.
This eclipse, happening with Saturn co-present in Pisces, is a “grow up now” moment, demanding we take responsibility for our own spiritual and emotional hygiene.
- Do you champion "medical freedom" when it comes to your personal choices but stay silent about the systemic injustices that deny basic healthcare to entire communities?
- Do you wholeheartedly oppose children coming to harm, but still find excuses for the systems and figures perpetuating violence globally?
- Do you preach about "high vibrations" and "letting go of what no longer serves you," but that philosophy conveniently only applies to setting boundaries with your broke friends and never with your toxic, wealthy boss?
Well, maybe this hypocrisy of faith, internalized and projected, will be put under Saturn's unflinching scrutiny. Saturn is here to test the integrity of your definition of "freedom."
This eclipse will dissolve the flimsy boundary between "my personal problem" and "our collective crisis," forcing you to reckon with the fact that no one is free until everyone is free.
Take a fucking stance. What are you fearing to lose by voicing & protecting your deep-rooted principals?
Why We Need to Get Weird in a World Obsessed with Order
We are deep in Virgo season = a time of harvest, analysis, and getting our shit together. It’s the energy of sharpening our pencils and our minds (Mercury - her ruler - is currently in Virgo, too!). But Virgo, left unchecked, can become a prison of perfectionism and anxiety. It’s the nagging inner critic (our nagging outer critic, if you’re my Virgo mum) that tells you your activism isn’t pure enough, your art isn’t perfect enough, your life isn’t optimized enough.
Every astrological season, the universe stages an intervention by dropping a Full Moon in the polar opposite sign.
It’s a necessary check-in, a cosmic "you good?" to make sure we don't get lost in the sauce of one particular energy.
Right now, Virgo season has us all mainlining productivity hacks, trying to organize our trauma into neat little folders & and believing the lie that if we just work hard enough, we can control the uncontrollable.
So, this Pisces Lunar Eclipse is the necessary antidote: a call to get messy, to feel, to dissolve. It’s the universe reminding us that the most important parts of life, like compassion, forgiveness, intuition, grief - cannot be quantified, optimized, or organized into a neat little box.
Pisces energy reminds us that we are all swimming in the same polluted water. This eclipse is here to flood the meticulously organized systems of Virgo with a wave of empathy (believe the victims!), reminding us that our individual healing is inextricably linked to the healing of the whole.
As Audre Lorde said, "Without community there is no liberation."
Don’t F*ck With Eclipse Magic
Now, let’s talk magic. Every time an eclipse rolls around, the internet floods with pastel-colored infographics on how to “harness its power” for manifestation. I’m here to tell you: don’t. Just fucking don’t.
Manifesting during an eclipse is like trying to perform delicate surgery in the middle of an earthquake while on acid. The energy is too chaotic, too unpredictable, and frankly, not yours to control.
Eclipses are wild cards, fated portals that the universe uses to enact swift, often jarring, change. Your job isn’t to tell the universe what you want (I know, I know, but trust me, you will be able to get back to your Becoming a Millionaire Overnight Subliminals soon enough, I promise!) - your job is to shut up and listen.
For thousands of years, our ancestors weren’t exactly lighting abundance candles during an eclipse. They were hiding, praying, banging pots and pans because they thought the world was ending.
In ancient China, they believed a celestial dragon was eating the sun. For the Vikings, it was a sky-wolf. In Vietnam, a giant frog. The common thread? A monstrous celestial being was trying to destroy a primary life source, and the vibe was decidedly apocalyptic.
Eclipses were seen as profoundly ill omens, especially for rulers (fingers fucking crossed!). In Mesopotamia, they were so terrified that they’d install a temporary “decoy king” to take the hit of any bad juju & then usually kill the decoy afterward just to be safe.
The death of kings, the start of wars, plagues, famines - all were historically linked to the sky going dark. More than a superstition (we tend to not give our ancestors enough credit for actually knowing shit), this sentiment was rooted in a deep understanding of cosmic order.
An eclipse is a moment when the natural order is suspended. The life-giving light of the Sun or the steady glow of the Moon is temporarily extinguished. It’s a glitch in the matrix, a moment of pure chaos where the normal rules of reality - and therefore, magick - don’t apply.
You’re trying to upload your intentions, but the server is down, the connection is unstable, and the line is flooded with karmic static. Trying to force a manifestation through that is inviting chaos into your life.
Your Eclipse Survival Kit: What to Do Instead
So if you can’t manifest, what the hell are you supposed to do? You can’t just hide in the closet (unless you want to, no judgment, I probably will just to keep away from hitting refresh on CNN News website to keep track on the END OF DAYS, or at least the end of GOP).
- Release, Don’t Request: Eclipses are for letting go. Instead of asking for new things, focus on releasing the old. Write down the bullshit you’re done with - the limiting beliefs, the toxic relationships, the self-sabotaging habits that taste like stale beer and regret. Burn that shit away, cleanse your space with smoke. Take a salt bath. Let the universe handle the cosmic decluttering.
- Listen, Don’t Speak: This is a time of divine revelation, not personal petitioning. The universe is screaming messages at you through dreams, synchronicities & gut feelings that feel like a punch. Meditate. Journal. Pay attention to the whispers. The veil is thin, and the downloads are coming in hot.
- Ground and Protect: The energy is intense and unstable. Stay home if you can. Avoid crowds, arguments & anyone who feels like an energy vampire (mum? you still reading?). This is a time for rest and reflection, not for diving into drama. Your nervous system is already dealing with the 24-hour news cycle - it doesn’t need your cousin’s conspiracy theories on top of it (sorry, Andy, but I really don’t think that Yuval Noah Harari is a part of secret reptilian elite, also: go read a fucking book for a change. And call mum.).
- Practice Radical Surrender: This is the ultimate power move. Trust that whatever is being cleared out of your life is making space for what is truly meant for you. It’s a tough one, this. When the universe is running a deep-clean on your life’s hard drive, you can twist and turn but ultimately - you can’t fight it, so you might as well flow with it. As the great Patti Smith said: "In art and dream may you proceed with abandon. In life may you proceed with balance and stealth."
Whatever endings arrive are not punishments - they are a liberation.
♍ VIRGO SEASON WORKBOOK 🌾
Sweeping in like crisp linen sheets and freshly sharpened pencils, Virgo Season is inviting us to ground, refine & weave a little magic into the everyday. ✨
I’ve made you a 34-page Virgo Season Workbook, a lovingly designed grimoire packed with:
🌑 New & Full Moon spreads
🕯️ A bespoke Virgo ritual
💎 Crystal + journaling companions
🧘♀️ Yoga + affirmations
🔦 The Hermit unpacked
🍂 Mabon / Equinox magic
…and plenty of original art, mantras & tarotscopes to keep you company through the season.
It’s a spellbook for clarity, ritual & a gentler way of moving with the cosmos. CHECK IT OUT HERE 🌿
🌾 👑 THE HARVEST QUEEN : A Guided Meditation for Thriving in Virgo Season
Virgo Season is coming to trade Leo’s wild bonfire picnic for something softer. Think golden fields, deep breaths & the gentle art of folding chaos into neat little squares. ✨
I made you a 25-minute Virgo Season Meditation to help you slow down, root deep & come home to your own sacred soil.
🌱 It’s a grounding, heart-centering spell wrapped in sound (with binaural frequencies, so headphones on 🎧)
💫☕
Ready to waltz with the planets??
I crafted a detailed personalized & actionable plan for each zodiac sign based on how the eclipse - and the September astrology ahead - messes up (or blesses up?) with your astrological houses.
✨The real feast is waiting just beyond the velvet rope for my lovely subscribers, aka the magical souls who’ve treated me to a coffee ☕💖
If I managed to sprinkle some stardust on your day, consider doing a tiny clickitty-click on a monthly subscription (cancel anytime!)…It fuels my creativity and gives you access to a treasure chest of delights: meditations, workshops, original tarot spreads, spellcraft, and all the good witchy-astro things.
