“The old world is dying, and the new world struggles to be born: now is the time of monsters.” — Antonio Gramsci
Okay, witches, weirdos, and everyone in between! Gather 'round, because it's time to talk about the cosmic shitstorm masquerading as a cute little New Moon in Taurus. Forget your essential oils and sound baths for a hot sec – this one's got teeth.
New Moons are supposed to be about planting seeds of new intentions, new dreams. Except this one feels like you're trying to sow sunflowers into radioactive soil.
Why? Because it's soaked in the blood of the third (!!!) brutal Mars-Pluto opposition. Mars, flexing his ego and ripping shirts like a drunken rockstar in Leo, just finished going twelve rounds with Pluto, who is chilling in Aquarius like some brooding supervillain muttering about systemic collapse and social revolutions.
And now? Taurus, sweet slow Taurus, has to build something real with the aftershocks still trembling through the air.
Take a shot of mezcal and let’s get into it, shall we?
So, yeah, usually a New Moon in Taurus is all about sinking your claws into the earth, making your money honey, and getting real cozy with your creature comforts. Think soft blankets, good food, maybe finally starting that garden or getting your finances in order.
It's no damn coincidence that tax season falls in Taurus Season — some medieval accountant-astrologer clearly looked at the stars and said, ‘Yup, let’s ruin everyone's financial security vibes right when they're craving stability’. Nothing says 'celebrate earthly abundance' like writing a fat check to the government and wondering if you can still afford bread.
When Sun is dozing off in Taurus, filing your taxes is just another way the universe hits the reset button on your stability, your cash flow, your ability to just be and enjoy the damn physical world. You plant seeds (literally or metaphorically) for what you wanna grow over the next month, focusing on shit you can touch, taste, and count.
Listen, I hope by now we can all agree that 2025 is going to be a year that was made for everyone's favorite Oxford dictionary entry : UNPRECEDENTED.
This year is a full-throttle, nitro-boosted demolition derby where history books are getting written in real-time — and guess what? You’re not just reading them, you’re in them.
With Pluto finally digging its claws into Aquarius for good, Uranus and Jupiter shaking Taurus like a soda can in a mosh pit, and Neptune getting ready to switch signs for the first time since the damn early 1800s, 2025 isn’t whispering change — it’s screaming it through a bullhorn while setting fire to every ‘normal’ you've ever known. This is the kind of year that historians in 2125 will circle in red and mutter, ‘Yep, that’s when shit really popped off.’
So, understandably, this year — no matter how badly we need it — the New Moon in Taurus won’t be your usual ‘vision board and lavender bath’ affair. It's about dragging your half-dead dreams through the trenches, setting fire to everything that keeps you small, and carving a future out of the smoking rubble.
See, while the New Moon is chilling in earthy, fixed Taurus, we've got Mars, the planet of war, action, and frankly, being a loud-mouthed ego maniac in fixed Leo (for which the same applies and I say it with all love & respect being a Leo myself), squaring off against Pluto, the lord of the underworld, power, transformation, and obsessive control, who's lurking in fixed Aquarius.
Yeah, you read that right. We've got three out of the four fixed signs (Taurus, Leo, Aquarius) locked in a tense standoff, and you better believe the fourth fixed sign, Scorpio, is feeling the heat too, even if it's not a direct participant in this particular dance macabre - my husband a Scorpio Rising just yesterday almost fired everyone & quit himself in the middle of an Irish wedding feast he’s coordinating here in Italy, which is kind of a good metaphor for this astrology: it’s a poorly mixed glorious loud mess of unstable energies that just happen to be the made to produce nuclear fusion together.
Ego clashes (Mars in Leo, naturally), power struggles (hello, Pluto), and a whole lot of "My way or the highway!" energy (Taurus digging its heels in).
So, you got Mars, the planet of doin' the damn thing and occasionally starting shit, currently doing the most in Leo. This cat's got the main character syndrome cranked up to eleven. It wants the spotlight, wants to preen, wants you to know it's the king/queen/non-binary monarch of its damn hill. It's all "Look at me! I'm Mr Meeseeks!" (and we all know nothing good follows when you hear that)
And then you got Pluto, the dark overlord of transformation and exposing buried power dynamics, intensely brooding in Aquarius. This force is here to burn down the patriarchy (can we please already?!), dismantle old systems (but keep the healthcare goddammit and get off the Signal chat) , hand power back to the people (also formerly known as democracy), and frankly: If the internet needs to go down for us all to look each other in the eye again, Pluto in Aquarius is probably fine with that.
BUT (yeah, yeah, I know, astrology is full of buts, hihi)
As chaotic and annoying as it is, is also pure rocket fuel for BLASTING THROUGH WALLS. Seriously. If you've got the guts to ditch what's clearly busted, what's calcified like ancient chewing gum under a school desk, this energy won't just move the roadblocks – it'll vaporize them.
NOW, just to add a sprinkle of glitter and existential dread to this mosh pit, we've got Venus – the babe in charge of love, your wallet, and making things pretty – currently swimming in the deep, often murky, waters of Pisces. Usually, Venus here is all about soulmates, fairy tales, crying at sad movies, and wanting to save the world (or at least adopt all the stray cats).
BUT this time, Venus isn't alone. It's holding hands with serious-as-a-heart-attack Saturn (the cosmic daddy figure demanding responsibility) AND the North Node. So, while Mars and Pluto are having a wrestling match, Venus and Saturn and the North Node in Pisces are over in the corner having a very serious, slightly teary, but ultimately fated conversation.
What relationships are built on more than just good vibes and shared playlists? What creative urge or spiritual path is your soul screaming for you to commit to?
This Pisces hookup is like a haunting melody compared to the Mars-Pluto blaring alarm bells, but it's got just as much power to wreck your carefully constructed reality. It's a serious reckoning with love, your worth (not just the number in your bank account), and what you're really building for the long haul.
This New Moon is a damn turning point. It's shoving your face in the dirt and forcing you to see where you're being a stubborn ass just because you're scared of change and -oh, the horrors - evolving.
It's highlighting every toxic power dynamic where you're letting someone walk all over you or where you're trying to play puppet master. And simultaneously, it's holding up a mirror, demanding you get brutally, beautifully honest about what actually feeds your damn soul and what commitments are worth sacrificing for.
🌿
Venus, Pluto, Mercury: Choose Your Fighter
Good news, kid — you’re not rolling into this New Moon totally naked and afraid.
You’ve got some heavy hitters flexing in the wings.
But fair warning: they're not handing out lollipops and free passes.
They’re handing you matches, a gas can, parental guidance advised.
🔥💋
First up, Venus blasts into Aries on April 30, kicking romance, money, and self-worth issues into high gear. No more passive manifesting or sitting around waiting for abundance to politely knock.
Venus in Aries doesn't manifest — she hunts.
She throws a leather jacket over her nightgown, kicks the door down, and demands: "Where's my goddamn treasure?"
When it comes to what you want — love, cash, security — you’re going to have to go after it like you mean it.
🌊💖
Right after that, on May 2, Venus conjuncts Neptune — and this is where the dreamlike, beautifully delusional chaos comes flooding in.
Yeah, your heart's got its fists up from Aries, but now Neptune may have slipped something non-lethal & definitely psychoactive into the collective Kool Aid for shits & giggles. Not Cool!
Expect gorgeous visions/visuals, impossible ideals, overwhelming waves of empathy — how come I never noticed how soft your face is?! And a few potential landmines if you’re not careful about exactly what you envision, idealize, empathize with & who's face your touch.
♒🔮
Meanwhile, Pluto stations retrograde in Aquarius on May 4, flipping the switch on a long, slow descent into the underworld of collective power struggles and personal shadow work.
Whatever systemic decay you’ve been ignoring — politically, socially, spiritually, internally — is about to start belching black smoke you can't pretend not to see.
Retrogrades are introspective by nature.
Pluto Retrograde in Aquarius?
It’s like your personal revolution hits a "pause and assess" mode — not because the revolution's over, but because you need to make damn sure you're not accidentally becoming the thing you wanted to overthrow.
🧠⚡
Mercury rolls into Taurus around May 10, and honestly, thank the gods.
Here it slows the mind down, grounds your thoughts, forces you to think practically:
"What’s actually sustainable?"
"What ideas are worth building?"
"What dreams can survive the real world?"
Big bonus: you stop talking yourself into circles and start speaking with spine.
🌕🦂
Then, get this: the pressure cooker doesn't let up — it boils over with the Full Moon in Scorpio on May 12.
Scorpio Moons don't do halfway feelings.
They rip the bandages off the half-healed wounds you thought you could ignore and demand cathartic, sweaty, ugly-truth level honesty.
This lunation will expose anything still festering below the surface — whether that’s your relationships, your finances, or your own damn soul.
🌪️💥
And finally, as if all this weren’t enough chaos confetti, the Sun meets Uranus in Taurus on May 17.
This is where things go beautifully or terribly(both can be true at the same time) sideways.
Breakdowns, breakthroughs, liberation from stale structures — all with a side of "didn’t see that coming." If you've been white-knuckling your way through the illusion of safety, expect the universe to rip those fingers off the wheel and swerve you toward radical freedom. Wheeeeeeeeee!
Saturn's heavy, Uranus is twitchy, Pluto’s brewing rebellion — and you're standing in the middle of it with a half-baked map and a backpack full of stubborn dreams.
Guess what?
Perfect.
That's exactly where real revolution begins.
How to Surf This Shitstorm
👹 Face your scarcity demons. Name them. Drag them into the light. No shame. Just brutal honesty.
✂️ Simplify. Cut the fat. Cut the clutter. Cut the crap. You don't need a 12-step manifestation ritual. You need a plan, a backbone, and a little reckless hope.
🌿 Rewild your worth. Your value is not tied to your productivity, your paycheck, or your follower count. It’s primal, inherent, un-fuck-withable.
💃 Move your body. This much fixed sign pressure will get stuck and fester unless you physically move it. Dance ugly. Scream into pillows. Walk till your legs ache.
🎨 Create. Not because it’ll sell. Not because it’s "marketable." Create because it’s the only sane response to a world coming apart at the seams.
🌍 Trust the earthquake. What’s crumbling was never truly safe. What’s being born is bigger, braver, and more brutally beautiful than anything you could have dreamed from inside your old cage.
And finally: Grow Anyway
This New Moon isn’t cute. It’s not polite. It’s not "good vibes only."
It’s an initiation.
The seeds you plant now will sprout in places you didn’t even know existed inside you.
Yes, it's scary. Yes, it’s unfair. Yes, it’s exhausting.
But gods damn it — it’s real. And it’s yours.
So pick up the shovel, punk. The world’s ending (again). What better time to plant a garden?
Alright, let’s tear into how this New Moon and the whole messy, glorious chaos of May’s astrology is gonna slam into your zodiac sign. I whipped up a raw little spell and a no-bullshit tarot spread for each sign — tailor-made to catch the fire, break the chains, and ride the weirdness this lunation’s throwing down. Grab what’s yours. Burn the rest.
♉️🌿💰
Taurus Sun & Rising
This damn New Moon is in your face! It's all about you. New beginnings, stepping into your power, showing the world who you are. But with all that fixed tension, don't be surprised if your ego (Leo Mars in your 4th house of home/roots or 5th house of self-expression, depending on your chart) clashes with outside forces or your own need for control (Aquarius Pluto in your 10th house of career/reputation). This could be HUGE for your visibility and career, but only if you're willing to stop being so damn stubborn about everything. Your relationships and values (Venus in Pisces in your 11th house of hopes/friends or 10th) are getting a serious reality check. Commit or quit, basically.
More Cosmic Fuckery Headed Your Way:
- Venus into Aries (around April 30th): Venus dives headfirst into your 12th house of secrets and self-sabotage. Watch for hidden desires bubbling up, maybe a secret crush, or dealing with lingering bullshit about your worth behind the scenes. It's prime time for some very private reckoning with what you truly value vs. what you repress.
- Pluto Stations Retrograde in Aquarius (around May 4th): Right in your 10th house of career and public image. This ain't the time for new power grabs, but for reviewing the ones already in motion. What structures in your professional life are genuinely serving your evolution, and which are just ego traps? Deconstruct your ambitions from the inside out.
- Venus Conjunct Neptune in Aries (around May 2nd): Still lurking in that 12th house closet. This might poke some seriously raw spots around hidden sacrifices, secret sorrows, or old wounds tied to relationships and self-worth. Get real with your ghosts.
- Mercury into Taurus (around May 10th): Finally! Mercury struts into your sign, your 1st house. Your brain clicks back into gear about you. Time to articulate your needs, speak your damn mind, focus on your physical self, and maybe even plan that rebrand. Get your thoughts aligned with your presence.
- Full Moon in Scorpio (May 12th): Boom! Directly opposite you, lighting up your 7th house of partnerships like a police spotlight. Culminations, revelations, or emotional high tides in your key relationships (biz or personal). Secrets might spill. Intense? You bet your ass.
- Sun Conjunct Uranus in Taurus (around May 17th): The Sun hits the great disruptor Uranus, also in your 1st house. Expect sudden bolts of insight about who you are, a fierce urge to break free from stagnation, or maybe just a radical new haircut. Shake up your identity!
New Moon in Taurus Spell: Own Your Damn Self
This New Moon is in your 1st House – it's seed-planting time for you. Find some earth (park, backyard, begrudgingly accept a potted plant). Grab a coin or a solid rock. Plant your feet firmly. State out loud: "I am solid ground. I am valuable AF. I claim my space and my power." Feel that earthy energy rise up. Bury the coin or place the rock somewhere you'll see it as your anchor to this new beginning.
New Moon Tarot Slap: Who The Fuck Am I Now?
This spread is about claiming your identity with this 1st House New Moon.
- The Seed: What raw, potent energy are you planting for yourself right now? What new version is emerging?
- The Bullheaded Block: Where are you digging your heels in, refusing to budge, and hindering your own damn growth?
- Magic Grow: How can you practically, sensually, and powerfully nurture this budding badassery?
The rest of the zodiac signs are available to paid subscribers only. If I managed to sprinkle a little magic on your day, consider please treating me to a coffee by subscribing. You'll fuel both my creativity and your access to a treasure trove of astrological guidance, meditations, workshops, original tarot spreads, and more!
